It is something that can't be avoided - it's not even only bound to the internet, it's in every media you can think of: the so-called Ice Bucket Challenge. What could have been a real change of pace turned out to be one of those internet fads again.
I will say it right now: I don't spend money for ALS and I don't care at all when somebody critizises me for it. Instead, I donate with something as or more important than money - and I will explain why I find it personally more important than donating money. I will also explain why I find the "You donate money = good guy ; You don't donate money = bad guy" moral very, very flawed.
Hypocrisy #1: Doing Things In Private And Modesty
Very interesting case of hypocrisy:
Imagine a football player donates money to a certain charity and it gets talked about all over the media. Some would accuse them of showing off and wanting to get publicity.
But if some unpopular person does the same and talks about it, it is all okay - after all, doing things in private is soooooo yesterday since social media exists. Everything I do, eat and think about must be posted so that the world knows who I am - hell no.
Just because somebody is not famous, doesn't mean that they can talk about their donations or good deeds to show how good they are. It's all about the way you convey it. For that, I find the Ice Bucket Challenge (IC from now on) totally inappropriate.
Bill Gates, Warren Buffett and Google donate billions to charity yet they don't talk about it or brag about it when they feel like it. Sure, they will tell you about it (or sometimes even not) when you ask for it, but they are modest and don't do it when it isn't necessary. This is modesty. Modesty means that somebody doesn't think of oneself higher or that person doesn't think that he's better than someone else. They could look at you and ask: "Ha, what did you donate for AIDS research? No penny, right? You'll never be able to donate as much as me, shame on you for that!"
Instead, they think that they aren't better than those who've donated money. Otherwise, they'd propagate it. They aren't proud or boasting of pride, instead they think of it as a good thing to do.
What I wanna say is: donate! Donate as much as you want but don't you dare bugging others with how much you've spent for something if it's for the purpose of showing how good you are. You CAN show that you donated something but do it the right way and show some modesty instead of boasting pride about yourself. Celebrate what has been done, not what you've done; otherwise, you may look like you have a severe case of narcissism.
Hypocrisy #2: At Least I've Donated Something, Right?
That is a fellacy very many people are falling for: if you spend money, you are a good person. If you don't donate money for something, you are a cold and heartless person.
To all those who think that way: do you spend every single penny for others, A.K.A. donate? If you keep even only one single penny for yourself, you are just as "bad" as the others who don't donate.
Let me elaborate on it: everybody needs money to sustain themselves, so keeping money to yourself isn't bad at all. How much you want to spend on yourself is up to you, all or only half of it. The most important thing is: spend it what you really want to spend it for. If you want to spend it for clothes since you need it, it's your main interest: need of clothes.
If you want something more exquisite to eat: desire to eat something extra delicious is your main interest, go for it.
If you want to donate money to charity: make those who get helped by it and the people affected by it your main interest.
Is that the case with most people on the IC? No, this is what bugs me. If you want to help and you can help, just do it and don't try to care about publicity and clicks. It distracts from the main purpose or supposed-to-be focus. I know a few who've heard of the IC. I asked them whether they've done it yet or not and some were asking what ALS was or why they should donate if they don't do it.
And I don't blame them, how should they? The IC becomes another one of those internet fads again because people shifted the main interest from donating money to show themselves off. "Hey, I've done it, such a boss!", "Hey, I've done it, I raised awareness about it!"
And these are the people I critizise: those who could donate, are willing to do it but only when they can show themselves off in social media or Youtube, selfish people or people who think of themselves first. Those who think that doing such a video helps without donating anything yet feeling superior to those who don't do such a vid or don't donate at all.
If you were all caring about ALS patients, you'd have informed yourself about ALS and thought about what these people could need the most and what I can do when I encounter such a person. Instead, self-advertisement everywhere to get a good reputation and image in front of others.
Remember: an action not done with love, is worth nothing. So spend love and care into what you are donating for. Give two damns about it.
And that is where I come to what I personally have donated to ALS patients - and I haven't even used money for that. I wonder what that could be~
Hypocrisy #3: You Haven't Donated, You Can't Critizise Me
A criticism I love to deconstruct: yeah, I haven't donated money. So what? Do I have to or need to? As I stated it above, no. Yet I will call myself as good as those who've donated. Why, you may ask? Simply said: because I've donated.
But not money, no. I donate time. You know, I could have played some RPG for hours but instead I indeed informed myself about ALS. Also, I spend time with people who also have diseases, illnesses, disorders etc.
I learn from them what illnesses they have, what they cause and what it does to them, how it feels like and what they need. My best friend has a lot of disorders. And still, someone can say I haven't donated anything to help people with illnesses? That's bogus.
Actually, thinking about it further: if you have a friend you spend time with who has illnesses, you can say: "I have donated time, effort, love and care. You think money is all you can donate?"
If you inform yourself about certain illnesses like ALS, MS, depression, bipolar disorder, Tourette syndrome and many more, and you think through what special needs they have and how you encounter them and try to get along with them despite their illnesses: you've donated more than you ever could with money.
No money in the world can replace love, care, time or effort. Scientists may get money to research cures but it won't help if they don't put time and effort into research. Also: what would money help if no one tries to understand all the illnesses I've mentioned above and those people who suffer from them? If no one dares to make the first step towards them, they will become socially shunned or less accepted and money won't help them getting over this hurdle either.
This is one reason why I fully support inclusion in schools: you should learn very early how to behave and act with people with disabilities. In a society, where calling somebody "retarded" is used as an insult, it's needed really badly. Every illness can be experienced less painful if that person has support from others. That is where curing them should start: making their lives less painful by interacting with them as normal as possible.
So to all of you who read this: let's donate! But not money, let's donate something more important: time, effort, love and care.
Links for this article:
For those of you who want to donate for ALS (as the IC was the trigger to write this) the following link:
http://www.alsa.org/fight-als/ice-bucket-challenge.html
There are also other charities in abundance which you can donate for but it's all up to your choice. Remember: if you donate, focus on what's important and don't care about how your image can benefit.
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